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    • Stronger Together 2023
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      • FAMILY AND LIFE CONFERENCE 2022 GALLERY
    • I Am Home 2021
    • Vibrance 2020

Category: True, Good & Beautiful Sharing

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  2. True, Good & Beautiful Sharing

My Journey Towards Being A Wife and a Mom

I remember joining a religious community, the Missionary Families of Christ ten years ago. I was 18 years old back then, a typical teenager, dealing with personal issues, insecurities, and low self-esteem. I never thought that my life would turn upside down as I grew deeper in my relationship with God. Slowly, I developed self-esteem, became active as a member of the Church, and became God’s servant, sharing His love and faithfulness with everyone, especially the youth.

 

Little did I know that all of these life-changing experiences were God’s way for me to live a grateful and happy life. He revealed to me along the way what my vocation is—to become a wife and a mother.

A photo from Chery and her husband’s wedding day

At age 25, I got married in the Church to the love of my life, and a year later, I became a first-time mom. Now, at age 28, I am a mother of two. I am always in awe of how amazing God is! My two sons are God’s daily reminder that He had a greater plan for my life—to give life physically, to nurture life, and to value life.

Cheryl with her husband and two kids

Moreover, life as a mother is a challenging vocation, but it’s one of the sweetest! Simply seeing the smile on my child’s face is my happiest moment. Now, one thing is evident: my mission in life as a mom is to ensure that my family lives a happy, holy, and pure life that leads to heaven. I know it’s difficult, but with God’s grace, it is possible. 

 

Life is a Miracle!

In my 36 years of the journey here on earth, I have come to realize that life is a brief happening. Life is short and fragile indeed, and that is why I choose every day to give thanks to God for the life that I am and the life of the people I loved. But just like any human being, I also have my weak moments. My chemo and radiation therapy have greatly impacted my mental health. Because of the adverse effects of my treatment, I became not only physically weak but also mentally and emotionally. It was also during that time, that I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety.

On my most exhausting days, I found myself wanting to end my life. I thought that to end the pain I felt, life must end. One morning, I woke up feeling so sad and I told God that I am ready to leave this world and join Him in heaven. I cannot bear the long treatment periods anymore and I did feel like giving up. I thought that I have already fought hard and tried my best to undergo all the treatments. As days went by, my self-pity intensified. I was also feeling the hardship that my loved ones has to endure because I am ill. I felt I am worthless and I am just a burden to everyone.

My Psychologist explained that my sadness and anxiety are consequences of the problem I was facing, which is okay because I am battling cancer. This would be a very difficult battle for any person. She also explained to me that somehow my aggressive treatment protocols affected some cells in my brain which could lead to me feeling down sometimes. Also, I tend to think in advance, which made me more anxious and uneasy. God has shown me later that I was wrong. Wishing for life to end just worsen the pain and exhausted my mind and body. I cannot end pain or stop loneliness by ending my life. I was missing the point. Even if I cover my mouth, hold my nose, or forced myself to stop breathing… every cell inside my body is screaming and wanting to be alive. The very life in me is throbbing. The more I resist it.. the more painful it becomes. I realized that I can’t stop life just like that. I can’t end my life just because I am in pain. I can’t end it because I’m tired. I can’t stop the life in me just because I don’t want to live and be alive. This is not the solution.I learned that for life to happen, I must be able to let it be. The pleasantness or bitterness of my life experiences depends greatly on how I perceive and respond to what life throws at me. When there are difficulties it does not mean that life sucks. I can have a more profound and meaningful life even when I am in my lowest and darkest moments.

My perspective on life has changed. I use to think of life only in terms of personal life, work life, family life, and even love life. Now, I know that I am the “life”. God’s greatest gift and miracle. To end the pain, all I needed to do was to be in touch with the life that is throbbing within me. By doing so, I am letting the miracle of life live. To consciously pay attention to this miracle present in me will take away all the sorrows and pain.

I choose to live life to the fullest way possible by allowing myself to enjoy the good side and endure the not-so-good side that comes with life. Dying is not an answer when life is painful and difficult. Living is the answer. Living well that is. Living to the fullest. Handling and managing life’s circumstances well with unwavering faith in the Lord is the best way to live life.

Life is a gift. But to live life joyfully and fully is a choice. I make it a deliberate choice to be alive… to value every breath. I know this is what God wants me to do. In living life with joy and gratitude, pleasant feelings occur and a peaceful mindset happens naturally. I am becoming a fulfilled life… filled with God’s love! To be grateful for every circumstance in life is my objective. To remain faithful knowing that God will never abandon me and that He will give me the strength I need to overcome any obstacles. To surrender everything to His will is what brings me peace.

Now, it’s crystal clear, I’m not just a mere surviving life. I am a thriving and joyful life. I am a miracle!

#ProofofLife #GiftofLife #Miracle #Grateful #LiveLife  #Gratitude #Catholic

Deciding to Celebrate My Own Journey this Easter

Every one of us has our set dreams and timelines, maybe some of us already achieved them or maybe some haven’t fulfilled them yet like me. In the past few weeks, I had this anxiety about being left behind by friends achieving something, and having this pressure to be like them. Then comes my insecurity and starting to compare myself to others and asking God why time seems so slow for me. But God always reminds me that he has perfect timing for everything and he will never forget his plans for us it only takes patience and a lot of faith. For now, I’ll celebrate and enjoy my small victories in life with my friends and family.

Easter gives us hope and encouragement to trust in Him, especially in this world of pain and sorrows. And our trust in the Lord will give us the strength to fight against unnecessary worries and fears. I always seek and pray for the goodness in everything that is happening in my life. Because I believe that If I seek the good even when in my hardships I see God, and that reminds me that God already won the battle for us and that is the life is worth living.

#CultureofLife #Prolife #ProLifeGen #HappyEaster

celebrating life easter easter sunday hope starting over

Authentic Manhood By Kuya Ansel Beluso

What is authentic manhood? I can only answer that question by recalling the journey I embarked on from being a raging faggot to being a man of God.

I am now 60 years old; but for the four decades of my checkered life, I was proudly, rabidly, flambouyantly gay. For me then, that was the only way to live. So clueless I was at that time about the evils that my actively gay lifestyle actually wrought on the world in which I lived. I thought that being gay was just that – being gay, which meant being happy.

The pursuit of happiness was the chief purpose of my life then. And I thought I was a success. In my career, I was the creative director of several top-rating TV shows and I even became a showbiz talk-show host. In my love life, I enjoyed the juiciest flesh around and conditioned my mind to believe I loved them and they loved me back.

Back then, sex was a commodity that didn’t run out. Every weekend, I’d hie off to some nearby province to taste the native delicacies. At one point, I participated in an orgy with 16 young teens I called boylets. I remember also having had sexual relations one at a time with the six brothers of my boyfriend then. At another time I went to bed with two brothers pimped to me by their own father.

Each time I look back on those days, I cringe – both at the enormity of my transgressions and at how totally unaware I was then of how much I was offending God.

All I thought was that I was just having a good time. Besides, I rationalized, the boys whose innocence I purloined badly needed the money I gave them – I was simply sharing with them the blessings of my material prosperity!

Everything changed when that prosperity I believed was there forever began to dissipate. There was no earthquake but my world tumbled down. It just happened that, one day, I found myself without a job, without money, without my boy toys, without friends. And what did I have lots of? Debts. A humongous mountain of debts. I was a hapless victim of the check-rediscounting monster that rapaciously ravaged many showbiz personalities then.

A telephone ringing sent shivers of fear up and down my spine because creditors harangued and harassed me even at the unholiest hours. There was one time I hid inside my bedroom closet, shedding quiet tears, as a loan collector abused my doorbell.

I began to turn to God – not even because I believed He could save me but simply because there was really nowhere and no one to turn to anymore.

I had lost the appetite for going home even when the work of the day had long been done. For one, my home was a living hell. For another, I was deathly afraid of debt collectors waiting in ambush somewhere. And I discovered that the adoration chapel was the only place open during those murky, dark nights. I went there – at first, not really to pray but to rest my weary bones and even wearier heart.

Then, the adoration chapel became a place of solace. I learned to cry – no longer to myself and at the world that, I felt, had betrayed me; but to God!

This went on for several agonizing months. My phone was cut off. My electricity was disconnected. At that point, I knew with a clarity beyond any doubt why some people contemplated killing themselves. As for me, I don’t know if it was my Catholic childhood which prevented me from thinking about killing myself or I was just too much of a coward to say goodbye, cruel world.

Then, Couples for Christ (now Missionary Families of Christ) happened in my life. They wanted somebody to help put up a TV ministry. It was the start of a romance with the Lord that has continued to this day and for the rest of my days.
“In His Steps” was the title of the 30-minute TV show I did for the community. It was about the amazing stories of individual transformation of people from worldliness to a life with God. They weren’t the “I used to smoke three packs but now no more” type of stories but truly extraordinary tales of how the Almighty proves His might in the lives of those who allow Him to move in them.

A self-confessed gun-for-hire who first took a human life at 14 found Jesus behind prison bars. A top-ranking official of the Alex Boncayao Brigade who mouthed the communist ideology like Bro. Mike Velarde spewed bible verses. A junkie who could neither start nor end the day without shabu. A chronic philanderer who made life Calvary for his wife and children. They were just a few of the people we featured on the show, and how they forsook their past ways to follow the path of Christ and gain the fullness of God’s promise of prosperity and joy truly boggled my mind.

They all had several things in common that I also wanted to have – a ready smile that does not disappear as soon as you smile back; a humility that uses active silence as a potent weapon against the vexations of the world; an inner conviction to respond to a higher calling instead of to a baser instinct.
Slowly, I learned what it meant to have a personal relationship with God, what the gift of sexuality and authentic manhood really meant, and how repentance and faith go together as the twin towers standing outside the portals to a life of genuine freedom and happiness.

I began to desire God. As I hungered and thirsted for Him, I ate and drank of Him. And purely by grace, I saw the Lord!
Today, I have totally slain my homosexual demons. At the start of the journey with the Lord, the past would still revisit me once in a while but not anymore. I have since learned how to be liberated from them so they cannot enslave me anymore. I have a great God who empowers me with His strength to vanquish the temptations of the world and the Evil One.

I now have a wife and three children (Noel by adoption; Gian and JBen borne from the love I share with Joyce). Today, my heart throbs with the peace and joy that have been forged in the bosom of God’s love. Words are so puny and inadequate to even just approximate the profundity of the joyful bliss that now dwells in my heart.

And I now dedicate every breath I take, every waking moment, every toil of my life to glorifying my Lord!

So what is authentic manhood? It is knowing God, loving Him and proclaiming His glory to the ends of the earth.

#LiveLife #TrueGoodBeautiful #HumilityOverPride #FullnessofLife

Fullness of Life Can Only Be Found in Jesus

I am Michael Caiga, a lay missionary of LCSC Live Life, from the province (Batangas) where one of the best coffee in our country (Kapeng Barako) can be found. ☕️

My Mama and Papa are instruments of God for our family to be closer to Him, especially when they became members of a renewal community. That was the start of my family’s journey with Jesus.

I am the youngest in the family. My siblings and I also joined the same community where my parents belong. I started when I joined the Kids Ministry. But even though we were already part of that community, I still encountered different kinds of battles in my Faith, Family and Life.

FAITH. I didn’t really believe in God before. I even questioned why my parents would always come home late from their prayer meetings and households. I really didn’t understand why they were doing it. Not until my parents invited me to join a Youth Camp in 2005. Even though I was hesitant, I was somehow forced to join because I needed to follow them. That Youth Camp changed my life. It changed my perspective about my faith. And after 9 years, it led me to my calling to be a full-time lay missionary, where I am right now. I believe it’s all grace from God.

FAMILY. My Family is the greatest gift of God in my life. But even my family is not perfect. I learned from my auntie that when I was in the womb of my mom, they first though of not continuing with the pregnancy. But praise God because they decided to keep me! Now, I am already 28 years old! I realize that every life in the womb of a mom is worth fighting for. Each child has an equal right to live! I also see the sacrifices of all the mothers who carry their children in their womb. It’s such a selfless act of love that is similar to the example of our dear Mother Mary when she said yes to become the mother of Jesus. I can truly see the image of Mama Mary in my own mother.

LIFE. At a young age I encountered a lot of battles between good and evil, life and death. One of those was brought about by my insecurities. Those insecurities ate me up and led me to confusion. I kept on asking God before, ‘Am I enough?’ This line of questioning led me to different kinds of addictions, and also confused my identity as a real man. This resulted in my desire to experiment therefore leading me to experience intimacy with the same gender. I thought that was what who I was. I kept on this path until I received a wake up call from God. I woke up from that nightmare. Binatukan Niya ako at unti-unti Niya akong binago. He brought me back to my real identity as a true man of God – that I am created in His image and likeness. It was a hard battle to conquer but the grace of God was more than enough to change and to bring my life back to Him.

I came to a point in my life when God showed me that I am enough because of His love. From there I realized how good He is in my life and that He will never stop reminding me of my real identity as a man. Now I am following the vocation where God is calling me. I experienced true love from Him and I am sharing that love to the girl that I am pursuing.

I guard myself against pride and instead pray for humility. Pride is all about selfishness, but humility will always lead me to true love. True love is selfless and true love is always connected to the image and likeness of our Creator. This is the same image that we have and that’s who we truly are.

Finding God in the Midst of Depression

I am Maria Eleanor Asejo, a full time missionary of No One In Need.

I grew up living a simple and ordinary life and with a Catholic upbringing. I consider myself as a successful student and a good servant of the Lord. During college, I was an active member of a youth community that I joined back then.I can say that my life at that time was truly beautiful and meaningful.

In the year 2011, I graduated and passed the board exam for Nursing. I started working in a private hospital as a radiology nurse but eventually decided to transfer to a public hospital to work as a bedside or ward nurse. Working in the ward was never an easy task.The demand of my job was too much for me to handle. It was physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually draining. There was a lot of pressure coming from myself, from my workmates, from my supervisors and from the workload itself. Because we were understaffed, the nurse to patient ratio was not manageable. It was even difficult for me to find time to eat during my duty hours. I usually spent my days off sleeping only at home. And because of my desire to be excellent, I dedicated everything to my work that I was not able to balance my life. I neglected the essentials in my life like time for my family and loved ones, time for myself and time for God.

At that point, I decided to resign and apply to another private hospital hoping that things could become better. But my struggles at work happened again. Until one day after a few months, I found myself in a desperate situation, having consistent suicidal thoughts. I wanted to end my life. I wanted to be terminally ill. I wanted to meet a dangerous accident just to have a valid reason not to go to work. I literally forgot how to feel happy. The life I used to see as beautiful and meaningful was nowhere to be found. I felt that my life became worthless. I felt lost and trapped.

God never abandoned me though. With His grace,I came to a point of realization that I needed help and that I could not go through these struggles on my own, so I decided to seek professional help. God provided me the people, the means and the strength to consult a Psychiatrist. After my consultation, I was diagnosed with Mild Depression. It was painful to accept but it was enlightening in a way. I was prescribed to take an antidepressant and to undergo psychotherapy.I followed her advice but I stopped taking antidepressants because of the side effects.

My situation prompted me to really look into myself, to reflect and to know my purpose. I watched videos and read articles about finding your purpose, goal, passion etc. And I consistently prayed about it. Because of my search for purpose, I came to a point that I realized I wanted to become a missionary nurse. I sought for ways how to become one until an opportunity came when I talked to the head of No One In Need, a group that works to for the Church of the Poor. I discerned for it and felt the strong call of God for me to resign from my current work and grab the opportunity to be a missionary nurse.

I celebrated my one year as a full time missionary in January of this year. I can say that my life is beautiful and meaningful again. It was a tough journey to take. It took me a couple of months before I finally came to a point of feeling fully healed. It was a very gradual process of healing. I believe it is the Lord that helped me get through it all. Though I still encounter some anxiety from time to time and have tendencies to mentally break down, I am affirmed that I will be able to get through them all because God will always provide the grace that I need in each moment. No matter how far and how dark life may seem, as long as we hold on to our faith and hope to God, life will always be beautiful and meaningful.

Journey to Natural Family Planning, the Porsuelo Way

Freddie and Nette Valencia’s Journey to NFP Porsuelo Way

It was on October 29, 1989 at the Nuestro Señora de Candelaria Parish Church in Silang, Cavite that Freddie and I made our commitment to say yes to live as husband and wife. This was 30 years and 7 months ago. After 4 years of marriage, through the invitation of Father Domeng Medina, who was then our Parish Priest, we were able to join the Couples for Christ community for Family Renewal.

On July 18, 1993, we dedicated ourselves to the Christ through the community.

Being members of the community taught us the way to live, not only for ourselves nor for our family but rather to live for Christ through our service to other families who likewise strive to build a family that is centered on Christ.

Community life made us appreciate more the sacrament of marriage which is our way to holiness. Moreover, the community made us more sensitive to the needs of other families who might be seeking spiritual guidance in bringing their families closer to one another. We have learned to always desire to share Christ with others even in our own small way.

In 2014, thru the group of Kuya Jun San Pedro, we were introduced to the Porsuelo Experience – A Natural Family Planning way of life. We met Nanay Feling Porsuelo in 2015 and since, she has been a part of our family life.

Whenever Nanay comes to Manila, our simple home is always ready to welcome her. Anybody who meets Nanay will be amazed by her very very simple teachings yet she shared them with such wit that only come for her Divine gift of wisdom.

We embraced the Porsuelo Experience for 3 reasons.

1) Its teachings on marital intimacy that has opened our eyes and understanding that indeed it is the key to an effective natural family planning experience. Once a couple discusses their respective needs and agrees on the real purpose of the marital act , the intimacy becomes more intense and the real joy is achieved.

2) NFP Porsuelo Way deepens and gives life to the sacrament of matrimony.

3) The call to procreation becomes real and meaningful to the us.

Although this is mostly for couples who are in their procreative years, Nanay Feling has also taught the NATO formula for those like us who are over 50 years old. NATO stands for the No Action Touch Only formula, which has worked well for us. Nothing has changed as initimacy is still preserved.

We commit to propagate the Porsuelo Experience as we believe in the true-to-life sharing of Tatay Ely and Nanay Feling. NFP is Marital Intimacy. This is the Catholic Christian way of fighting against the artificial contraception program of the government. This is the best way to explain responsible parenthood. This is why as husband and wife, we commit to a lifetime of learning and enrichment for marriage and family life, as we help share Christ to others through NFP.

NEC ALAB: Fired Up Session Reflection

I am Jonelle Junio, the eldest daughter among the seven fruits of my parents’ love for each other.

My parents raised us as devout Catholics, living the faith, defending and promoting life.

Last Tuesday, during the Day 2 session entitled Fired Up with Hope, of the Online New Evangelization Conference: ALAB, my heart and spirit were reignited to protect what God has gifted us – our life.

The world has redefined the meaning of life and family based on its subjective truths, based on personal feelings. It is telling us that we are brave if we stand up for what we think is right. Unfortunately, the world also covers cowardice behind what it dictates as comfortable and pleasurable. It has given more importance to life’s pleasures than to life itself and to the Giver of Life. We have forgotten that God not only gave us life but also love – a love that will sustain our life, our family and the whole world.

Before this pandemic, before this “new normal” that we now live in, some countries had already legalized a lot of policies that promote the culture of death. A lot of people believe that it’s alright to redefine marriage into a union that is not limited between man and woman; that it’s okay to get a divorce; that it’s okay to have an abortion; that it’s okay to end someone’s life through the process of euthanasia; that it’s okay to take birth control pills.

We think it’s okay to do things as long as we are “safe and comfortable” and we “do not hurt anyone,” or so we think. If you come to think of it, if we don’t speak the truth according to our Creator, if we fail to help them see what God wants them to see, aren’t we hurting them more?

The New Evangelization Conference’s Fired Up with Hope session, re-ignited the fire in me to stand up for God and to be brave for God. He calls all of us, each and every one of us, to be brave, to preserve our capacity to give life and to defend this most precious gift to us. I am fired up with hope keeping my confidence in God and that His plans for me are best. I am assured that this life which God breathed into me has a purpose and that I am destined to experience it to the full.

My Life is a Gift And How I Live This Life is my Pathway to Heaven

Hi! I am Victoria Buenafe from Batangas. Just recently, I was called to become a Mission Volunteer in Live Life Pillar of LCSC.

Bunso ako sa anim na magkakapatid. At an early stage of life, naranasan kong mawalan ng family member. I was 4 years old when my eldest sister died. Sabi ng mga kapatid ko, meningitis daw yung nagging cause. After 3 years, sumunod naman yung Dade ko. Cardiac arrest naman yung dahilan. Growing up, namulat din ako agad sa mga problemang dulot ng mga pinansyal na aspeto ng buhay. Dumadating kami sa puntong dalawang beses lang kumakain sa loob ng isang araw, nagdidildil sa asin at dumating din sa puntong kinailangang huminto sa pag-aaral nung dalawa kong ate na nasa college na at that time.

Dahil doon, lumaki ako sa tahanang malaki ang pagpapahalaga sa edukasyon. I was doing good in school kaya nakakuha ako ng scholarship nung nag-college ako. Pero hindi pa rin naging madali. Dumadating sa puntong yung binabaon ko araw-araw na pampamasahe papuntang school, inuutang na lang ng nanay ko para makapasok ako that time. Kaya wala akong ibang pangarap kundi ang mapagaan yung buhay ng Mame ko.

Unfortunately, when I was in 3rd year, my mother got hospitalized. Lagi naman na siyang na-oospital dati simula nang mawala yung Tatay ko at sa t’wing nangyayari yun, laging yung mga ate ko ang nag-aasikaso sa kanya. Nung ma-ospital siya that time, meron kaming exams noon – prelims. Nasa higher engineering na ako kaya sobrang pressure ako to maintain my grades para ma-maintain ko din yung scholarship ko. Akala ko that time, kagaya lang din yun ng mga nagdaang hospitalization nya. That she will get through it, pero hindi. She passed away without me by her side.

Gumuho ang mga pangarap ko, yung mga pangarap namin na hindi pa man nasisimulan ay bigla na lang naglaho. Madami akong regrets as a daughter – madami pa sana akong pwedeng gawin para sa nanay ko pero hindi ko nagawa. I should have been this kind of daughter to her. For the longest time, I lived a half-baked life – kunwari strong independent woman pero breaking inside. Sa t’wing nakakasalamuha ko yung mga titas and nanay both in the church and in the community, nadudurog ako, nilalamon ng mga regrets.

But the Lord saw all these. He has been my light. Looking back, ang daming taliwas na pwede sanang nangyari but God’s voice was always stronger. He comforted me and reminded me na, “I am not a God of the past, I am a God of the present. You shouldn’t live in yout regrets – madami kang dapat sana ay nagawa, pero wag mong kalimutang madami ka pang magagawa.”

Because of that, I set another dream and that is to meet my parents – yung Mame and Dade at ate ko sa langit. They lived their life to the fullest – full of pain, endurance, love and sacrifices. I realized that life is a gift and tomorrow is not guaranteed. It took 3 important lives para marealize ko yun. ‘Yung mamaya at ‘yung bukas, hindi yung sigurado. Ang tanging sigurado lang ay yung buhay ko ngayon, right here and right now na ibinigay at ibinibigay sakin ng Diyos. I still have a long way to go for I to reach heaven, but I will live my life without regrets. I will not live a half-baked life because my Creator wants nothing but the genuine and authentic in me. My life is a gift and how I live this life is my pathway to heaven.

This is Victoria, naniniwala at nagpapahalaga sa biyaya at grasya ng BUHAY.

Welcome Back, The Lord Loves You

Hello, my name is Bok Magadia and I’ve been in the MFC Community for almost half of my life, starting out as a member of the Youth Ministry then the Singles Ministry and now also as a Mission Volunteer for Live Life.

My service in the community has made me realize how God really loves us. I feel happy and fulfilled, as if I was in heaven, and this has made me more passionate and ready to do God’s work.

Last 2010, I passed the board exam and I was overjoyed for it was what I had been praying for. In spite of that, it was also the start of my frustrations – with my family, my career and my relationship with the Lord. I was depressed because I felt that my family was not supporting me in my decisions, that God had abandoned me during that time of need, and that the job I was in was not what I had hoped always for.

Just as I thought that I already had enough struggles, I did not expect another one coming. My father, who already had hypertension suffered a stroke. The doctors told us that we needed to raise half a million for his medical expenses.

I got another job at a BPO company, with good pay and healthcare for me and my father. The healthcare card was supposed to cover half of the expenses for my fathers’ surgery and medication. But six days before the release of my healthcare card, my father suffered another stroke. And after all that the doctors did to save him, my father still left us. For all these, for what had befallen us, I blamed God.

I felt alone and isolated from my family and friends. I turned my attention to getting involved in a number of impure relationships. For four years, I was in and out of bad relationships with the last one getting me in deepest trouble. I consulted a Psychiatrist and was diagnosed with Major Depression. A major effect of this feeling was the thought that the only solution to all my problems was to take my own life. All my attempts were futile and I slowly realized that the Lord still loved me.

I tried to go to Church, but could not utter a single prayer. I just cried and cried. And when I attended Mass, I stayed outside for fear of the stares of the crowd, but more so because I felt unworthy in front of the Lord.

I continued praying and attending Masses but with my feelings still remained unchanged. One day, I believe God answered my prayer, when a friend reached out to me. After a long time, I had someone to talk to, someone to share my story with. I felt my cross get lighter. He invited me to attend the Live Pure Conference in Makati. In that conference, there was an area where one could go to confession. It had been 5 years since my last confession so I mustered enough courage and approached a priest. After the sacrament, the priest hugged me and said, “Welcome back, the Lord loves you”. There was an indescribable feeling of relief and contentment all over me. I was happy. I felt God in my life again, His immeasurable love and His unfathomable mercy.

After the conference, I decided that I would go back to Him, to glorify Him, to serve Him. I made sure that every time I was offered an opportunity to serve Him, I always say yes.

3 years after that decision, I realized that God really is a promise-keeper. He left my prayers unanswered because He was molding me to become a better version of myself and He was preparing me for the blessings that He would give me.

Today, I am blessed with a wonderful relationship and soon we will be receiving Gods’ gift in marriage. I have realized that life is beautiful. We only have to choose Him and all else will follow. After all that has happened to me, I am here and I commit to serve the Lord forever.

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